Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

I was tired of fighting.

I had run out of hope.

Why is US hell bent on a private capitalist free opinion sharing platform like Tiktok? What happened to their mantra of so-called free spirit of capitalism and freedom of expression that they have been preaching to the rest of the world for decades?

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

Did Obito ever fully redeem himself in everyone's eyes?

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

It’s here now, writing to you.

Do straight guys like to have sex with men when they smoke meth?

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

Why cant I stop thinking about counsellor between sessions?

The sadness was still there.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

It’s still here.

After more than 60 years of development, here is the nuclear engine that is set to go to Mars with NASA. - Farmingdale Observer

You are like me, then.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

What can I do when I'm ugly on both outside and inside? What do I do? Cut myself off from the world to make everyones lives better? I'm a monster. I hurt feelings, and I say what was said to me. I feel like I'm nothing but a burden. What do I do?

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

And the sadness?

What are your thoughts about Hulk Hogan at the Republican National Convention in support of Trump and ripping his shirt off? Did he exaggerate?

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

How come Taiwan is LGBT friendly, yet Japan and South Korea are not?

Be who you already are.

I was tired of trying and failing.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

Why do I get spun and then want big fat cocks to suck?

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.